Do you want the magical weight-loss formula that always works for any person struggling with their weight? I have it and I'm going to share it with you in this post.
No to Willpower and Big Goals (Whew! What a Relief!)
I don't have much willpower. If you think that the reason I lost weight is due to willpower, I assure you it is not. And I don't have that much faith in setting big goals. Too many times, I have become so disappointed in having a big goal that I didn't reach. If a person sets too many big goals and fails to reach them, that person eventually just quits.
Yes to Daily Process!
What I do believe in is "the process." The process is all of the tiny steps taken each day to achieve something better. Am I scared of huge goals? They feel like a self-defeating trap. Am I scared of tiny steps that are easy to do? Tiny easy steps are just my style. :D
Focusing on Process is not a Cop-out
I am gym buddies with many of the best weightlifters in my gym. We all focus on tiny steps to improve. Often, we just get caught up in the fun of trying something new. If you had fun doing your exercise, does it really matter if a goal was met that day? Enthusiastic people reach more goals by relishing the process. It is the journey, not the goal, that matters most.
So here is the "magical process" for losing weight/weight management:
1) Drink 8 cups of water per day.
Start the morning by drinking a huge glass of water. Drink water when you are thirsty. Drink water when you are bored. When people are gobbling food in front of you, drink water or chew on ice cubes. Drinking all of this water not only feels lovely down the throat, but it keeps your stomach feeling more full in between meals. I've come to think of my glasses of water as an meaningful sign of my new rules for eating.
2) Food journal every day.
I do understand how resistant people are to food journaling because I initially felt that same way. However, every week that I food journal I am successful with my eating. Every day that I didn't food journal, I slipped.
Food journaling directs the brain to have better thoughts about eating. It helps keep the brain focused each day on the task at hand. It is hard to explain to a person who hasn't journaled, but all of the triggers and patterns eventually become clear. We can only face what we know. Knowing the triggers and patterns is half of the battle. Problem-solving is easy to do when we know the problems.
Also, keeping honest about calorie consumption happens by telling the food journal the whole truth, even if you are disappointed in yourself. Believe me, journaling on the very worst days helped me the most. It provides quick closure to a binge and is ritualistically a fresh new start for every new day.
3) Exercise at least 3 times per week.
Exercise makes a person care about himself or herself. If you go to the gym in the morning, it is far less likely that you want to binge later in the day. Regular exercise makes you deeply invested in your body. Self-love learned from exercise permeates into other aspects of life, including weight management. And yes, active exercise will help keep off about 10 to 15 pounds.
4) Eat a daily calorie amount less than your body's energy expenditure.
A moment of tough love here: Whatever you currently weigh, your eating formula got you there. If you have many excess pounds, your eating formula contains too many calories. I do sympathize with my heavier readers because I remember having the shocking realization that "OMG! I eat way too much!" However, facing the truth is the very best thing you can do.
Many diet books and even medical journals will provide numerous rationalizations and excuses for why you don't eat too much but are still too fat. Ignore that nonsense. If you are too fat, you need to eat less daily calories.
Logically: If you reduce your calories a little (100 to 200 calories less per day), you will lose a smaller amount of weight over a slower period of time. If you reduce your calories a lot (such as 500 or more calories per day), you will lose a larger amount of weight at a faster pace.
(FYI, I'm 5'9" and physically active. I currently eat about 1600 to 1800 calories per day. At my heaviest weight, I used to eat about 2,300 to 2,500 calories per day--far too much. Now, I am eating about 700 calories less per day than I did at my fattest weight.)
5) Weigh weekly, and carefully analyze struggles to problem-solve for better solutions.
I go to a weight-loss meeting each Tuesday night, but you can also do a weekly weigh-in and a weekly analysis on your own. We need to be accountable about our eating, which is accomplished by the weekly weigh-in. Watch the patterns of the weekly weigh-ins to see if you need to tweak your formula.
We don't want to keep repeating the same stupid mistakes, which is accomplished by analyzing that week's struggles and problem-solving for better solutions. If certain ice cream makes you want to binge, ask your family to purchase a different treat that is not a trigger food for you. Solving one problem at a time eventually makes a great food formula.
6) Be consistent with the process--every day, every week, every month.
This is the real deal, friends. If you follow this simple process for many days, then weeks, then months in a row, you will see yourself transform. It is the consistency of following the process--all of those little daily actions--over a long period of time that is the magical part.
You will love what you become. Consistently following a weight management process makes you the person you want to be--and it permeates other areas of your life. The process is about wanting something super good for yourself and being a big enough person to want it everyday, all day long.
You are willing to do the tiny daily steps every day
because they add up to your great life.
And the weight loss is just the pretty frosting
on this awesome self-love cake.
This series of posts has ended! The 10 posts of this series include my total personal formula for long-term weight loss without stress and burnout. This is the exact formula that has me consistently losing weight every week since October 2, 2012. (And I'm still losing!) If you don't know what to do, just use my formula exactly as described in these 10 posts. If you missed reading some of these posts, you can find them on the right side of my blog. They were posted in December 2012, January 2013, and February 2013.) I hope you found this informative.
What do *you* think? How is your daily process working for you? Was there anything surprising or new to you about my formula, as described in these 10 posts? I'd really appreciate if you'd tell me any aspect of this weight loss/management series that you would like more posts about. And, of course, anything else you'd like to add.
Have a successful day full of little accomplishments!
:-) Marion

Marion I'm so glad I found you. You put it all together so succinctly!
ReplyDeleteHi Gwen! Succinct--what a nice compliment. You know, I love your writing too.
Delete:-) Marion
Staying out of my own negativity is essential. Otherwise I will beat myself up for the tiniest infraction (extra 2 oz of almond milk, missed exercise while fighting off the plague. . . ) and use it as the excuse to stir in my pity pot and not focus on the progress in my process.
ReplyDeleteRealizing that permanency takes time to grow. If I do not loose weight for three days I do NOT change what I am doing. If I stagnate for three months I know I need am adjustment.
Lose weight, not loose weight. Duh
DeleteHi Jane! Yes, the process is more loyal than the scale. I agree with your point--"If I do not lose weight for three days, I do NOT change what I am doing."
Delete:-) Marion
Oh, Jane, I forgot to say that I admire *your* consistency with the process. And you do it with great humor. D
Delete:-) Marion
Drinking lots of water is essential for me, and it is also a measure for me because if I'm derailing, it is usually the first good habit to go!
ReplyDeleteHi Jade! Very good point. For me, when I see myself getting grumpy about putting a *few words* in my food journal, I know I'm derailing and need to have a serious talk with myself. :D
Delete:-) Marion
Water is also essential for me to stay on track. It makes such a difference.
ReplyDeleteI like that you keep track in a food journal; it's a great way to stay accountable. Also, it's easy to see "little" things creep back into your diet. I know that when I start gaining weight, it's usually "little" things I add: a small piece of cheese, a few extra almonds, and an extra piece of fruit. While it may not seem like much, the extra food is hundreds of calories... And they add up, especially when it becomes a habit.
Hi Andrea! Yes, when I stopped nibbling (basically because I didn't want to journal all the nibbles), I started losing weight. Those tiny nibbles make people fat.
Delete:-) Marion
It took me a year and a half to lose 110 pounds and there were definitely times when it was EXHAUSTING and frustrating and way too slow for my likes. I'm glad I stuck with the plan because it was working. Working out 3-5 days a week, counting my calories every day, and keeping my eye on the final prize helped me weather those tough times. I am so glad I reached goal!
ReplyDeleteHi Lisa! I visited your blog, and you look super! But more than that, you really turned your life around.
DeleteIt probably was exhausting to lose the weight, but it is my experience that people who maintain such a big weight loss, such as yours, work as hard to keep it off as to lose it. So you had a grueling 1 1/2 years of practice for maintaining it. :D
:-) Marion
great points :) I believe in taking 1 small step at a time till it becomes a habit and then moving to the next...it helps me be consistent, most of the points mentioned by you were my small steps during my weight loss journey and now they have just become a part of my daily routine
ReplyDeleteHi Tanvee! I'm glad you commented so I could get a chance to check out your blog. You have a lot of great ideas.
DeleteYes, the small steps get easier as they become habits. Half of the successful stuff I do requires almost no deliberate thoughts anymore. I've just done it so many times, it's just the right thing to do.
:-) Marion
These are great points, even as a bandster it's good for me to remember. I think one of the fallacies of lap band surgery is that the band will do it FOR you - nope, it's just another tool to help you do it. All of these are great ways to ensure success. I especially like the NO to willpower and big goals.
ReplyDeleteHi Chelle! Last year, I read a series of posts about what it is like for people with lap band/bariatric surgery. And it sounds like the exact same issues everyone with weight issues face. And I read that there are lots of ways to "cheat" even with bariatric surgery, such that many people gain much of their weight back. So I hear what you are saying. There really is no easy way for any of us.
Delete:-) Marion
Of course this will work!
ReplyDeleteI feel very strongly about number 4. No matter what the reason, you will be what you eat. Perhaps you have reasons to require fewer calories than someone else. So be it. Modify it with activity the best you can.
Hi Dr. J! Yes, the truth of calories is rather annoying--how teen son stays so thin despite eating 6 slices of extra cheese pizza. But I just had to come to peace with *my* calorie requirements, which are very much less. As you say, "so be it."
Delete:-) Marion
My favorite is #6, consistent focusin on the process. It's intresting that we have ended up doing more or less the same things to lose weight, though I don't do the eating windows thing.
ReplyDeleteI have noticed an interesting thing: as time goes by and I focus on having regular, nutritious meals. the less food I want to eat. I'm now satified with less than I was a year ago.
Hi Satu! I don't think there are any new ways to lose weight. I used the word "magical" with a touch of humor, but yet, anything that works is kind of magical.
DeleteLast night, I was talking to another TOPS member who is really in control of her weight management. She said, There came a point where I just *knew* I was going to do well with my weight." I think you've come to some point like that where you're at peace with your food and, instantly, food no longer means so much. And then it gets so much easier. Is that what you mean?
:-) Marion
I agree with Gwen - very succinct and very straightforward. I like that you're so pragmatic and I love your constant reminders that it's all about our actions: the little decisions we made day after day, hour after hour. No magic wand.
ReplyDeleteThanks for that!
Deb
Hi Deb! As I wrote this post, I knew that people had heard all of this before--but many probably didn't believe it. Who wants to believe that tiny, almost insignificant, things add up to more than those bold things we think we need to do? It seems to go against our whole culture.
Delete:-) Marion
The steps you outlined above are pretty much exactly the things that I have come to realize over the past year, and especially as I started lifting weights/doing CrossFit, and then completing the whole life challenge.
ReplyDeleteBeing able to pinpoint small problem areas and come up with strategies to 'fix' them has helped. Step by step. One day at a time.
Your posts have been amazing Marion. Absolutely loved them all!
Hi Dr. PlumPetals! Thanks! I hope that people who are struggling begin to realize that *the basics* done step by step, one day at a time, actually provide great results for many people, such as you and me.
ReplyDelete:-) Marion